When we think about what it means to be “effective”, it might help to think about the opposite. Having ‘no effect’ is something we can grasp a little easier. If your actions have no effect, are not moving you forward, or have no impact, then those actions are not effective. In contrast, if your actions have a big effect, are moving you forward in your life, and have positive impact on others, then you and your actions are effective.

Decades ago, Stephen Covey wrote The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change. The habits he describes in this book are just as relevant today as they were when it was first published. Let’s take a look at the 7 habits. The first three habits are about personal effectiveness and are the ones we’ll look at in this article. The second three habits inform us how to be effective with others. And the seventh habit is all about renewal and tie the first 6 together.

Habit 1: Be Proactive

Being proactive is all about taking ownership of the response to stimulus. Covey asks us to “look at the word responsibility [as] response-ability – the ability to choose your response…[Proactive people] do not blame circumstances, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior.”

Putting space between stimulus, like someone saying something that angers or embarrasses us, and our response is the essence of the habit of being proactive. As humans we have the freedom to choose our response. We may not have control over the stimulus, but we have control over our response to that stimulus.

This is so powerful, and a bit scary if you are not already in the habit of being proactive. Scary because when you sign up for being proactive you can’t blame others or circumstances for how effective you are. The opposite of proactive is reactive. A reactive person might say they couldn’t get work done because the weather was dreary, or because someone else made them spend their time otherwise.

The remaining six habits build on the habit of being proactive.

Habit 2: Begin with the End in Mind

Think ahead several decades. You are at a party and being honored. All your friends, family, and co-workers are there. One by one they stand up and say something about you. What do you want them to be saying about your life to this point? About the kind of person you are?

This is what the habit of beginning with the end in mind is about. It’s thinking about who you aspire to be. Without knowing the destination, we most likely won’t arrive there. Covey explains that “all things are created twice. There’s a mental or first creation, and a physical or second creation to all things.” Thinking is essential! We must imagine the person we want to be in order to know what response to stimulus we should choose.

We see the world through various “centers.” We can be money-centered, or self-centered, or work-centered, or, the center encouraged by the author, principle-centered. We make decisions based on what we center on. However, Covey points out that the only center that won’t change is the principle-center. If unchanging principles guide your life and response to stimulus, you will be consistent and effective. The other centers can change and will yield less effective results.

Habit 3: Put First Things First

When you’ve decided the kind of person you aspire to be, with the characteristics your friends, family, and co-workers described at your future party, you must make daily decisions aligned with that vision in order for it to come to pass. That is, you must put “first things first.”

Covey outlines 4 quadrants, with axes of urgent and important.

Quadrant 1: Tasks that must be taken care of right away that are of high importance fall into this quadrant of “urgent and important.” Crises and deadline-driven projects fall into Quadrant 1.

Quadrant 2: Important but not urgent activities such as planning, visioning, and relationship building are a part of Quadrant 2.

Quadrant 3: Activities that are not important but are urgent in some way fall into this quadrant. Interruptions, some email and some texts belong to this quadrant.

Quadrant 4: The items in Quadrant 4 are neither important nor urgent. Busy work, some fun stuff, and time wasters are found in Quadrant 4.

When we want to put first things first, we may need to eschew activities we’ve been doing in Quadrants 3 and 4 for activities in Quadrants 1 and 2 where the important work is. Shifting work from these unimportant quadrants can be difficult because activities here are usually familiar and sometimes fun.

This does not mean you can’t spend any time in Quadrants 3 and 4. It does mean to be a highly effective person we want to spend more time in Quadrants 1 and 2 in order to put first things first and to intentionally become the person we aspire to be.

Summary

Cultivating the first three habits will set you up for success not only for your own life, but in interacting with others, as we’ll see in the next article covering the remainder of the habits. There is so much in the book that will help you be highly effective that you will want to read or re-read it!

Look for next week’s article covering Habits Four through Seven!